Chapter 2 - The Difference
That Makes A Difference
What is the difference
that makes a difference?
I've been obsessed with that question for my entire life.
People who succeed do not have fewer problems than people who fail. It is not what happens to us that separates failures from successes. It is how we perceive what happens and what we do about what "happens" that makes the difference.
Think of W. Mitchell's two terrible accidents, and contrast it with John Belushi's external success.
W. Mitchell chose to consistently communicate to himself that his experience had occurred for a purpose.
His internal communication formed sets of beliefs and values that continued to direct his life from a sense of advantage rather than tragedy-even after he was burned and paralyzed.
John Belushi had everything externally, but internally, he'd been running on empty for years before he died of drug abuse.
Long ago, I realized that success leaves clues, and that people who produce outstanding results do specific things to create those results.
I believed that if I precisely duplicated the actions of others, I could reproduce the same quality of results that they had.
This is called MODELING-If you precisely reproduce the specific mental and physical actions of another person, you will get the same results.
If it's possible for others in the world, it's possible for you.
Richard Bandler and John Grinder, co-founders of NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) found that there are three forms of mental and physical actions that correspond most directly to the quality of results we produce.
In order to model effectively, these fundamental ingredients must be duplicated:
1) Belief system-"Whether you believe you can do something or you believe you can't, you're right."
2) Mental Syntax-the way people organize their thoughts. Mental syntax is like a code-ingredients and order
3) Physiology-the mind and body are totally linked. The way you use your physiology-the way you breathe and hold your body, your posture, your facial expressions, the nature and quality of your movements-actually determines what state you're in.
THE STATE YOU'RE IN THEN WILL DETERMINE THE RANGE AND QUALITY OF THE BEHAVIORS YOU'RE ABLE TO PRODUCE.
We're actually modeling all the time.
How does a child learn to speak? We live in a culture that's consistent enough so that what works in one place will very often work in another.
The world's greatest modelers are the Japanese.
The One-Minute Manager by Ken Blanchard and Spencer Johnson is a model for simple and effective management of any human relationship.
It was put together by modeling some of the most effective managers in the country.
Think of this program as a guidebook for conscious modeling with greater precision, a chance for you to become conscious of something you've always been doing in your life.
If someone is doing something outstanding, the immediate question that should pop in your mind is, "How does (s)he create that result?"
My thoughts by dr uzoma
ReplyDeleteModelling is the way to go
Our belief system must be modelled to succeed
Our mind and body too
The body is the servant of the mind
DeleteDR.DENNIS EKWEDIKE :
ReplyDeletePeople who succeed do not have fewer problems than people who fail.
Success leaves clues and people who produce outstanding results do specific things to create those results.
It is not what happens to us that separates failures from Successes rather it is how we perceive what happens and what we do about what happens that makes the difference
It is not what happens to us that separates failures from successes. It is how we perceive what happens and what we do about what happens that makes the difference.
ReplyDeleteIf it's possible for others in the world, it's possible for you.
Success leaves clues, and that people who produce outstanding results do specific things to create those results.
Chukwuebuka Asadu
Great
DeleteThis chapter teaches us that
ReplyDelete1. It is not what happened to us that determines our success or failure, it is the way we perceive it and the way we react that determines if we make success or failure out of it.
2. That success and failure has particular trait and habit, that can be modelled. If one wants to be successful, he should look at the model of success and follow it.
3. If someone is doing something that you found as successful, then the question on the mind should be' how did he do it's to become successful?
Dr. Semiyu Olagolden.
Our successes in life are determined by just two things - whether we are reactive or proactive
DeleteHow did he do it to become successful?
ReplyDeleteCorrection of the last point. Thanks
Dr Semiyu Olagolden.
In this chapter, I understood the following
ReplyDelete¶ It is not what happens to us that separates failures from successes, it is how we perceive what happens and what we do about what happens that makes the difference.
¶ Success leaves clues, and people who produce outstanding results do specific things to create those results.
¶ If we precisely reproduce the specific mental and physical actions of another person, we will get the same results.
1. The state you model yourself into determines your future success.
ReplyDelete2. The state you're in determines the range and quality of the behaviors you are able to produce .
3. Believe, mental syntax and physiology helps us to model our thoughts and success.
Good
DeleteWe are a perfect reality of what we think we can or cannot.
ReplyDeleteWe create our world (reality). Our mental and internal feelings tilt us towards the same outward experiences.
Modelling always works. It's a proven formula for success. Ask why and follow the steps of the person who has done or gotten to where you want to.
Modelling is the beauty of life
Delete